Letter From Kelson - Week # 65 - USTIKUYD

Good Morning From Sunny California!!!

It be nice to see ya'll this day! I git to right this day becuz I feel awsum! I am yer new mishionry. Im frum meroni utaha, end I woant to no "Whit R u Jakwagons Laughin et?! 

Ok, sorry, I was trying to be Redneck, but it seems I can not. Please don't get angry with me if you are a redneck reading this and you feel offended. I have a Zone Leader who is from Wyoming and we make fun of his accent and the way he talks/texts all the time. He is super chill and we enjoy his speech all the days of our lives (not the soap opera). He also has a pretty nifty bull whip that we have all taken the opportunity to take a crack at! ;)

This week was awesome!!! There are so many good things that have happened that I will have to put them into a story because I promised last week, which you are now receiving this week because of a delay that has taken place due to the trip to National Scout Jamboree by my mother and brother.

May the Story begin...

It was a light and clear day, opposite of a dark and stormy night ;).  There was a young man who was off on a journey of epic proportion. He battled the elements of fire, hail, wind, fire again, and maybe a little bit of wind. As he fought he met these damsels, or domsels...because there are both men and women in distress because of the purposes of this epic journey. 

Man this story is kind of lame...hold on let me revise a few things...

The Lone Missionary was riding upon his iron horse across the plains of Stockton, accompanied by his sidekick Elder Tonto.  They decided that they just wanted to blow this whole place up!!! Just like the movie was described to them in great detail by those people who they meet with and feel compassion on them for their inability to watch movies. And by blow up, we mean submerge in the holy waters of Baptism. 

Now we follow our heroes into the big city, where there is the evil Dr. Sunshine and his evil minion Windy! Everyday there seems to be a frontal offensive by these two evil doers as they strive to cool everyone down in the waters of baptism. However, our heroes are not stopped by these feeble attempts because, lets face it, We just look awesome, and when things explode we just walk away slowly and don't look at the explosions...Oh yeah I went there. After battling these evil villains the two heroes find a family of hostages who seemed to be untied and just ready for them to take them back into safety (The evil elements just seem to have a lack of preparation when it comes to making the rescue process difficult, maybe they should go back to Evil villain school to become better at what they do?) and away from the evils of conspiring men/elements.  This family has the name of the Gonzales Family. 

Our heroes have been searching high and low for these people and they have finally found them, and as they have found them they are proceeding to take them to safety away from those things that would destroy their family. On Wednesday the heroes will be escorting them to the Safe house and when they are there they will take a tour. Once they have seen the tour they will be more likely to come visit the safe house once a week for 3 hours to receive instruction and inspiration on how to better their lives. It is going to be awesome!! And they are seriously considering this safe house for life. It seems that the hard work of our heroes is finally paying off. Now all the Heroes have yet to do is invite them to enjoy the cool refreshing taste of the cool blue waters of Baptism!!! I think they may take them up on the offer. It seems that they have been prepared for a long time, or they have been working the strands of rope off of their wrists and feet so that when we showed up to rescue them they were like "Where have you been!!!" Then we stare back at them and shrug with a face of "Sorry" 

I know this story was not up to the par of the last one, but you know it is easier to describe the damage afflicted to my own flesh than to have you hear a different story of heroes villains and rescuing of damsels, or domsels that I haven't already told you. I need to work on my creative juices this week and I will get back to you... Okay?

Keep up the e-mails, the prayers and the happy moments!!! 

Love ya,

Elder Wheeler

P.s. Mother I feel that I have been very mean to you in the past about my typo correction requests, with that in mind I would like you to forgive me one more time as I exclaim, TYPOS!!!! I love you, even though it may not seem that way!